As most days in my life, they start with the ringing of the phones, hunting my little boys shoes and homework from the night before, cooking breakfast, pulling my hair out, and trying to get him to school on time all before 7 am. The past two weeks have been extremely hard on me. Why? I have gotten my days and nights mixed up due to stress. The past month has been like a whirlwind. I have found myself at a crossroads. A road I thought I passed a long time ago. I thought this was miles behind me. I figured this road had grown over with the fruits of my labor, the asphalt had sunk into the earth as I moved forward and left my crossroads behind. Well, it didn't. It was still there, paved and shiny.
I was battling something. Is this God talking to me? Or is this the devil? Did I really need to get out of gospel music and leave all the politics, griping, egos, promotions, management behind? As another promotional month came to a close, I looked in the mirror. For some reason I couldn't get comfortable with my own skin. I constantly try to live the life God has called me to, but, my life and knowledge of the promotions business has worn my spirit out. Its my 16th year of promoting. I was so exhausted battling myself.
It hit me when I was throwing the football with my son one evening.
He said, "Dad did you win the charts this month? You look like you lost."
I thought I was hiding my inner turmoil well. But, it was obvious. I was battling an old demon. Was I ready to step out of the radio promotions world and back into my own body? Was I ready to wake up and face the day without fighting the nay sayers and live a normal life?
Then I remembered my first year as a promoter in Nashville when an old record promoter from the Cashbox days told me, "A good promoter will risk it all for a record he believes in. A good promoter will sacrifice it all for his records." I also remembered this promoter being called to testify in the murder of Cashbox Magazines chart tabulator, Kevin Hughes.
Let me stray just a second so I can tell you the story of a man that helped change the way radio promotions operate. Kevin Hughes was the new director of charts at Cashbox Magazine. He was in charge of counting the charts, adding and removing radio stations from the charting list, and tabulating the weekly charts. Little did this young man know, he was about to be entering the hidden world of Nashville and its radio promoters, Mafia, pay offs and chart fixing. In his first week he was approached by several industry leaders to clean up the charts and make them more legitimate. In his quest to make Cashbox Magazine a reputable airplay chart, he dropped stations that were dishonest and refused to take any money for placing songs on the charts by radio promoters or independent labels. This was a common practice making millions for everyone involved. Kevin was starting to get worried about his job here in Nashville. He voiced concern to his family and fellow workers. Nashville at that time was like the turf wars on the "Godfather." You never knew who was paid off or out to get you.
The Mafia radio promoters were out to pay Kevin Hughes off. Kevin was approached by a couple of radio promoters at a country radio seminar and offered an envelope with $15,000 to fix the charts that week. He refused and told the promoters he was wanting Cashbox Magazines charts to be legitimate. He told them the shady radio stations and buying chart positions was over. He stood his ground. The promoters decided to take the $15,000 and have the chart tabulator murdered.
One dark night while Kevin and up and coming country singer, Sammy Sadler, were leaving a Music Row studio they were ambushed by a man in a ski mask. As Sadler was entering on the passenger side of Kevin's vehicle, a man, wearing gloves and a mask and displaying a gun, appeared at Sadler’s door. Sadler threw up his arms to protect his head and was shot once, as Kevin ran for his life screaming. He was shot several times, as he fell to the ground begging for his life the hit man fired the deadly shots into Kevin Hughes. Kevin Hughes died along with his dreams and his of his career in the world of radio promotions, charts.
I still don't know why the murder of Kevin was on my mind that day. Or why every song I had ever worked was playing in my mind as I threw that football with my son. But, I knew that Kevin stood for what he believed. He fought for what was right, when it felt wrong. He lived up to his name to the end.
I thought if this were secular music only and my job was not helping others and seeing lives changed and souls being saved, I would walk in a heartbeat. I would shut the doors and never look back. But, it wasn't. It was my calling, it was my destiny, it was my place in life. I knew without a doubt God called me to promote the Word.
Watching from my bedroom window one night I started to cry. I thought, "God if you called me to do this, why is it so hard? Why is the opposition tough for so many? Why do we have to endure so much?" The devil began to move in, "You're not in His will, you're in it for the glory, in it for the fame, in it for the awards."
I realized something that night looking out that window. My calling was stronger than my fears, politics, or the devils defeating words. It was stronger than my doubt. I also knew that every time I help an artist chart their first record, or get to hear their song on the radio, it gives me a flash back of my first days in the music industry when I was excited. I remembered that dreams do come true. I realized I was in a spiritual battle. I was being tested and tried. God had big plans for me. He still has lives somewhere in the world that would soon be reached by one of the artist that God sends my way. A shut in would someday soon be lifted up in the dark of night because I was man enough to stand my ground and answer my calling not for a season but for my lifetime..
Rick Hendrix
http://www.rickhendrix.com
Author: RickBHendrix
| Author's Website: http://www.rickhendrix.com
Written: 02/01/2006
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Category: Leave No Stone Unturned
Comments: 53
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Great story. I had no idea the music industry was this bad. Kudos to you-
Rick, I read your article every month, and I am always amazed of the great things you say and the wisdom you have,(and yes, it kills me to say you have wisdom) Just kidding.... Sometimes as an artist we forget the fruits you bare for all of us.But I do want to comment and say I really appreciate your efforts in trying to make things a little easier for us on the field. I too feel like you sometimes, when you feel like you don't even know what God's calling is, I am dealing with a lot right now myself, but God didn't bring you or me here to forget about us. He sometimes just tests us, I guess to see what we are made of. Safe Thus Far
Unreal- Angie I will pray for you and Rick. I love your music. I agree with you. God will not leave us. We usually get stressed and leave him. We are usually giving up and walking out the door when a miracle is around the corner.GREAT article Rick- Welcome back!!
Oh, My, God, could this be any more for me. I have felt the same way forever because it gets so hard. The stress of needing a new single, but can't get it and it makes you wonder sometimes if you even called. Then you have to realize that you are just being "tested" as Rick says.
i think we all battle this anymore. as a fan of southern gospel i wonder everyday how i can fit in Gods plan and live in this world. i am not a singer or big person i am a nobody but i too battle the same daily questions. i will lift you up rick and thank God for your hard work. i love reading your columns and will put you on my prayer list. you must be doing something right
the devil doesnt fight his own
Oh and angie and justin i didnt mean to forget you guys. i love you both dearly. i will remember you- justin where can i buy your music. i bought hoskins already
I enjoyed this article. I actually read the first few comments, the one that struck me themost of sourse was from angie hoskins it sounds as if she along with rick hendrix has been batteling something too big for them to handle. i will keep them in my paryers. God bless you both.
Its just like God. We have started a great prayer list
Why would anyone kill over music. Thats so sad. I guess money is in everything.
Great article again, Buddy. Like Justin and Sue, I can empathize with your struggle, because I struggle with this stuff too. And I'm just a simple songwriter.
Just last night I was praying and I was telling God, "Maybe I'm not supposed to be doing this." Every song I demo to artists gets ignored. Silence. Months of silence. I wish someone would have the guts to call me or e-mail me and say,"These songs are horrible, Chris," so I can write some better ones.
The only positive feedback I've gotten on any of my songs came from... Rick Hendrix. And that encouragement from Rick was what motivated me to write gospel songs and send them out. And that encouragement keeps me going.
I've gotten some positive notes from songwriting great Neil Enloe, too. If Rick and Neil believe in my ability, I must be on the right track.
I love you, Rick. This business needs you.
Chris J. Becker
Cedar Rapids, IA
Sounds as if someone needs to get close to God again. If your called to do something, you would not have this much doubt. Sometimes your called to do something because your arrogant or love the money. Not becuase God is leading. So, you artist, writers etc that have this much doubt call McDonalds.
Rick, Hang in there brother! You inspire so many people. You have touch more lives than you will ever know. You are in my prayers along with my fellow artists, songwriters and others that are fighting daily to fulfill their calling. Like someone said, "Satan doesn't fight his own!"
This is directed to "Roger." All anyone is trying to do is help each other along the way, not to beat anyone down like you just did. in your comment.
ROFLOL- MS Angie-I <as the South would say> I belly laughed on that one. WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO that was great-I needed that. Way to go girl-
Doubt is in the UN--Holy part of our flesh and mind. We can live in that side of our bodies or live in the side of Jesus.
well if you put it that way it sounds encouraging, but i can see where miss. angie is coming from you were very insulting to her and mr. hendrix and the rest of us that doubt from time to time and that is not saying we are weak christians it is just saying we need to be certain where he wants us.
No Roger is on another board and he meant it exactly as it was written. We all have doubt and distress. God comes to answer and mold us during our trying times. The greatest women and men are developed from doubt and crisis. No one and I mean NO ONE is without doubt. We all doubt our faith, life, families, jobs at some point in our lives.Without doubt we sometimes cant find the real meaning of our belief system. I love disucssions like this. And I really enjoy your columns Mr Hendrix. You are a great man. Hold on and keep looking up.
Roger,
Rick, Roger and then Angie:
Way to go Johnathan- I couldnt agree more with every comment you made.
I would like to start out by saying that I work with Rick on a day to day basis and anyone who thinks that he is in this for Money, Fame, or Awards, are badly mistaken. I have never met a man who will put money aside and just let the Lord lead him like Rick Hendrix. He is a true man of God and those who judge him, or try to drag him down, will stand before God for it.
I got home from work and WOWZA this story got crazy. Rick and the others. Read the last paragraph of the article. God is bigger than fear and defeat. We will feel it. We will face it. But, he will get us through.
Why is it that when we are in need of encouragement, the spiritual police show up? Never understood that one. A true lack of compassion IMO.
You got that right. The world is full of negative people. In this day and time we find more doubt than faith. its just that way. We are only happy when were busy or successful. No one can handle down time or rejection. Its really hard. I suffer like all Christians. I too get very discouraged and full of doubt. That doesnt make me less of a Christian.It makes me an active Christian. Seeking his grace and healing.
Hey Rick. Thanks for having the nerve to expose a little part of the dark side of the music industry. I'm sure you've only touched on a small part of the dark side that so many of us in the Gospel Music and associated ministries deal with. Great article.
I didn't get to say this last time...
But Angie,
The Hoskins Family's music has been a blessing to me from the moment I heard your frist song! I'm believing that God will move your mountains or/and strengthen you!! Just know I'm praying for you!
Jamie Carter
All of us like Job may go through really hard times in our lives. We may be beset on every side and of course there are always the 'friends' like Job's who are there to tell us "God must be angry at you or you must be out of His will." Re-read 1Kings 19. If Elijah can go through the tough times and suffer doubts, then we all can. But remember God was not in the mighty winds, and He was not in the earthquakes. He was the still small voice that keeps you going even when you are tired and discouraged. Even when you see the negative side of the industry remember; one candle in the darkness. And for those who would sit in judgment; tsk, tsk, tsk. I know it sounds cliche but they need to ask themselves, WWJD? Did he not go to the home of the tax-collector; forgive the adultress; show mercy to the Samaritan woman's child?
Rick, We all face obstacles. Maybe its the Lords way of having you slow down and stay focused. I love your work and appreciate you like some of the others.May God keep you strong. And this too will make you stronger. Welcome back!!!
Also, good luck to the others. I have you in my thoughts as well.
This is for Roger Larkin:
My curiosity was intreged so I went back and read all the comments, I too must agree with Rick Hendrix and Angie Hoskins we all face down time, it's nice to know that even those we admire for their talents and their successfullness, well they are just like me. I will pray for you two especially I guess there is no need to pray for the self-rightous Roger, after all he is always on top,
Wow- the ladies are coming out fighting.
I think what Roger is trying to say is people in your profession should stay on the positive. Its not the fans place to uplift the artist or our preachers. I couldnt imagine having to worry if my pastor was strong enough to handle the church and its pressure.
Roger Larkin said, "Sometimes your called to do something because your arrogant or love the money. Not becuase God is leading. So, you artist, writers etc that have this much doubt call McDonalds."
Spoken like an individual who has never known the joy of having God's Call on his life. One who is truly called of God would never fail to understand what Rick was so clearly saying.
In the future, Mr Larkin should make his comments in crayon, so we can all better understand immediately the importance we should place on his mean-spirited comments.
As for Rick, there are no words capable of expressing our gratitude to him. Last December, Rick did something for Anita and I that was so way-over-the-top in kindness - that it defies description.
He is a great man with a great calling. Thank you, Rick, for your faithfulness to we artists - and to our Lord. We continue to hold you up in prayer and thank God for you.
Cliff Cerce
The Cerces, PO Box 8525, Springfield, MO 65801
417-863-8440
http://www.thecerces.com
.(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)
I was glued to my computer monitor and every word Rick wrote while reading his article.
Well,Christians need support too. I am not sure where Roger is coming from. I appreciate all Rick Hendrix has done and continues to do. We keep you on our prayer list. Your a true man of God.
You sound like the kind of promoter we would like to have. I sing with a group called "Divine Trinity" and we are working on our third project right now. We love what we do! It does get discourageing when you get into gospel music and find out that everyone in the industry is not faithful. When you find someone that is, it is truly a blessing from God. Keep up the good work and the Lord will truly bless you. If you ever want to check out our music you can log onto divinetrinityministries.com
Oh what an endearing column. I pray God enlightens your path Mr. Hendrix. You are an extremely important part of this business. I cannot imagine gospel music without you. Stay strong prayers are going up for you buddy.
????? Did anyone see the Primetime Special on radio promotions and payola tonigh?????t Dale
Primetime Live ABC-
Its not our place to support the doubt in pastors and artist minds. They are here for us to feed and learn. Thats kinda a double standard on their part.
Its not our place to support the doubt in our pastor and artist minds. They are here for us to learn and feed on. Thats kinda a double standard. Wouldnt you think???
Roger,
I am so glad that you place that much faith in those that hold leadership roles and ministries, but you are getting ready to be "let down"!! Seems as though you think they are super human and should have no sense of doubt, depression, sadness or any negative feelings. I hate to be the one to tell you but I could list many from the bible that struggled with those same emotions. So, are you questioning God? Because he placed those very people in their leadership roles. I guess I should start naming names....Elijah, Job, Thomas, King David, John, Mary and Martha, Moses......you need anymore?
Just thought I would help you out!
Blessings
Jamie Carter
Roger,
I trust you will prayerfully consider Jamie's excellent comments above.
Also - please consider this.
Hebrews 11 has often been called the "Heaven's Hall of Heroes" Chapter of the Bible. Here, the writer of Hebrews reminds us of the great heroes of faith who have gone on before us to their heavenly rewards. And, many of them professed doubts at times.
But, in Hebrews Chapter 12, the writer tells us that we are now running our own race - while those very heroes of Chapter 11 (the ones referred to as the "great cloud of witnesses' in verse 1 of Hebrews 12) are surrounding us (compassing us about) - as if they are watching our race and cheering us on.
But - the writer clearly tells us in verse 2 that we are to run our race "looking unto Jesus."
We are not to look at those great heroes of faith, even though they were some of thegreatest saints of the Old Testament. Rather, we are only to look to Jesus.
Why? Because man is fallible - Jesus is not.
Some of David's greatest and most-often quoted Psalms were written in times of his despair and depression - and are testimonies to the resolve that he had to rise above those emotions and limitations.
Hope this helps, brother.
Cliff Cerce
The Cerces, PO Box 8525, Springfield, MO 65801
417-863-8440
http://www.thecerces.com
.(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)
If what you and I are doing is the will of God for our lives and is going to be a great blessing to others, the Devil will most certainly fight it. Doing what God calls us to will always be harder than going the other way. Just look at Jesus on the cross. He could have forsaken God's plan and called 10,000 angels to rescue him and let him take over the world, but he stayed in God's will and did the hard thing. So it is with us.
If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit
- Galatians 5:25.
A great pastor and preacher once made this comment ' doubt and confusion come from satan, so when you face that, hold on to this truth, - 'he ain't gonna cause you to doubt unless you are doing something to upset him' Satan doesn't want us to accomplish anything and sends doubt at times to stop us or slow us down if we are. As humans, we somethings 'fall for that', but it doesn't mean we aren't doing God's will, in fact it is proof of the opposite, satan doesn't fight you if you aren't doing anything.
DeeAnn
TGIF Today God Is First
Rick, thank you again for another profound article of encouragement. It is during the darkest, weakest moments of our lives...that is when God will reveal His Awesome Power to us. How can we recognize the brilliance of light unless we first saw darkness? How could we ever appreciate climbing and getting to the the mountain top, unless we first experienced the valley below? Rick, I truly wish we could shield you from the enemy's fiery darts, but I know THE ONE that can. Please know we are praying for you.
We all know the devil is a liar and a murderer. We know because the Lord and his apostles told us that the devil is out to destroy, to wreck, to distort and to pervert anything that is wholesome. We know that satan is not only the enemy of God but that he is also our mortal enemy.
Tony Partigianoni
http://www.ksgm.com/images/gospel.gif
Pure SGM & Quartet-Style Singing
http://www.ksgm.com
I am impressed. This is from the pen of a man with integrity. Don't ever lost it!
I just posted (even with a typo) and then went back and read all comments. My father and husband are both in the ministry and yes, even they sometimes, as well as I struggle with doubts and fears. Someone who never fears or doubts is what I believe could be called self-righteous. Even the Lord spoke about the Pharisee and the Publican. Go back and read it! He NEVER belittled the Publican for his contriteness. David even said once that a contrite spirit the Lord will not turn away (paraphrase). Keep up the good, Rick! God bless!``
As a "new" solo artist in Gospel who struggles every month with how to go on with the call on my heart when I see so many negatives, I feel your pain Rick. When I am told "We only book groups" or "We only book artists who are on the radio" I have to wonder "why did He call on me..?" When I can't find people near home who want to sing in a group or quartet so I could stop fighting those "no solos here" responses... I used to question it but now I accept it and pray harder about what He'll have me do. As in scripture, my attitude is POINT ME AND I WILL GO!
i was jus reading the book of danile and how when the music of cornet psaltry ,sakbut and dulcimers were sounded the masses of people including the jews bowed before the false god
Rick,
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